Monday, November 26, 2012

0 Survival of the sick Vs. the healthy

Why is it that when something bad happens people need to sweep it under the rug?
No one wants to be around sick people to long, its like we are making the environment toxic.
People like you to talk about you're illness to begin with, I think that has more to do with curiosity, we like to be in the loop..
But if there aren't any progress people want to forget how fragile life is, how you one day can be healthy, and happy and the next day, seize to exists.

I feel people are starting to forget that I am sick, it feels like their faces are saying: like deal with it, don't talk about it, and if you try really hard maybe you will just forget that you are sick. I have!
I have never read an article in a magazine with a person who are
struggling with a illness. Only sunshine stories, miracles some will say. They have fond a way to lead a normal life with a few adjustments, and they always talk like: I wasn't going to let this get me, I am stronger then the illness.

But what does that to us who cant start eating apples, or take up ceramic and 2 months later everything is better than before you got sick..
For most of us we have to live with the disability and a life that chronically illnesses causes -Pain!
Most of us are no more happy than physically healthy people on the happy pill.
Being  chronically sick is not life-learning, it does not make you more aware of all the magic in the world.
It sucks big time, and it is an long process to accept it.
The first day after I realized that this was not going to go away, I didn't walk to the mirror and said to myself, you can do this, you will have a normal life.
I cried, curled up in a fetal position and felt that the world was shattered, dreams disappeared and not a single person around me who understood it. They were just relived that I got to live, they didn't think what kind of life I would have!!!
Its going to be okay, its suck a standard phrase in health care sector, but it doesn't always end well!.

And we who don't get to live with a sunshine story, we need people to show us that we belong.
Someone to say :You are not alone, what you are thinking is normal, and you are allowed to lock yourself in you're mind for a while.
Mourn what you have lost, remember what you have accomplished: and give yourself time to accept what has happened to you. You also need to be allowed to create new dreams without anyone judging you for not following the treatment plan set by Norwegian Directorate of Health..

We are all different and we need to do things at our own pace, without being judged for being difficult, hysteric, psychotic, resolute, manipulative, optimist, suicidal, fearful, stubborn or tongue-tied!.
We are humans, we react differently, and there must be room for us all.
For when it comes down to survival, the only person who can save you, are yourself!

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