Tuesday, December 7, 2010

4 Because of them

Isn't that what all of sick people out there are trying to find; a cure, or a way to make life manageable?
Illness doesn't really show any racism, it hits us all hard. maybe in different ways, but we all go through the same stages of pain before we get to realization, denial, anger, or grief are some of the steps we have to take if we have a painful chronic disease, or a deadly illness.

We all have to find our own way to fight. and some times we give up for a couple of hours or days, and then we pick ourselves up again and start over. not one of us will give up without a fight, and we can't, if you have a bad day think of the people around you. and fight for them.

The worst for me when I was going to be put on a respirator was that if I died? How could I be there for them? And to say that it is okay? To give them a shoulder to cry on? When I was on that respirator I didn't fight for me, i fought for them...
I knew that they could live without me, but I couldn't be the reason for their pain, because I gave up.
That's what I did, and keep doing.


  1. Stay strong Alexandra.. The solution is out there somewhere, I am sure of it!
    Lots of love, Elisabeth

  2. thank you Elisabeth. i will keep hoping and fighting for a cure :)

  3. Alexandra, may I please ask....why were you on a respirator? Was pain too much you tried suicide? Please know there are people like me to help support all the ones who struggle with tears as we try to find ways to cope. HUGS

  4. I was on a respirator because I got an abscess in my right lung, and a huge infection, so I was on it so that I could breath why they tried to save my life.
    They had to perform open surgery and remove my lung sack and clean my lung from all the infection.
    Thats what this blog is about. if I can help one soul out there to know they are not alone then this was worth putting my soul on the world wide web :)